2011

I am awful at posting... awful... and I'd blame it on my boys and husband, but really it's my fault for wanting nothing more than to play all day and have fun! I love my family! This year hasn't been quite exciting as some, but none the less, it has been a

good year and it's not quite over yet!

Chase started a new company with a friend of his and it loving it! The company's name is Pride Restorations- they specialize in flooding, any water damage really, fire, wind damage, mold removal- to be completely honest they can and will do just about anything. The company has been doing well, so well we don't get to see Chase a whole lot, but it's nice to know that he's out helping other people in their times of need.

I got to quit my job a few months ago and am really enjoying being able to stay at home all day with my boys. I'm not that great on keeping up with house work though, but I hope I can change that soon. (I really just don't like the repetition in cleaning the house... pick up Chase's socks, pick up boy's socks, clean dishes, do laundry.... pick up Chase's socks, pick up boy's socks, clean dishes, do laundry and so on.) My family is such a blessing to me though and I love taking care of them in every way I can.

Jackson just turned 4! I can't believe how old he is. He is such an awesome big brother and is super smart... He know all the letters of the alphabet and their sounds and just the other day he proved to me he knows his numbers now too! He has an awesome imagination and loves everything outdoors, especially helping his Dad work on the motorcycle and his little 4

wheeler.Time flies and I am enjoying watching this little boy grow into a handsome little man.

Clayton will be turning 2 in December and is a little mini Chase in every way. He loves his Dad so much and tries so hard to be like him. Clay is also finding his voice and it doing very well with talking... His favorite right now it saying "I toot!" or Jackson will tell him that he tooted and Clayton will say "ewwww, drosss" (hasn't quite got the G sound down, but it is dang cute!) Clayton has some crazy expressions and always trying to get you to smile and laugh.

This year we were able to go down to Moab with my family and enjoy some awesome riding and scenery! We had so much fun and the boys loved every minute!

Just a couple months ago we bought a 1986 motorhome that we named Gurtrud and we nicked named her the Durty Gurty. We got to take her down to the sandunes and give her a spin and came home with a broken harmonic balancer in the motor... Luckily it's a inexpensive fix. She's a blessing to have tho, and we have so far really enjoyed her hospitality. I'll add pics of her later when I up load them... she's a beauty!

We have had a lot of fun this year, but mostly have just tried to work hard to support and care for our family so that in future year we are able to play lots!

Humph.....

I'd like to think I've grown enough in my life that I'm more knowledgeable than I have been in years past. Apparently this is not true. I see things not the way I want to see them, but the way it's important to see... all sides and situations... I see a girl searching for light, but keeps allowing the darkness to capture her time and time again. Every time she comes up for air, she is pulled back down without a fight. I fought for her once, as did many, but we now see we can't do anything for her if she's not going to put up the ultimate fight. I try to tell her what I see, what could be, might be, should be important but she's stuck in a current of the thickest fog... she doesn't care and because she doesn't care she's hurting everyone in the process and because hurting is one of our greatest adversaries, Satan, the devil, the person I loathe, uses that against us and pulls us apart and instead of having unconditional love we all give up and get pissed off. Anger fills every part of our body and it's hard to let go... it becomes blinding, we become biased, independent, stubborn and rude and we just keep right on hurting. I see all this, and because I see all this I'd like to think I have a bit more knowledge then I did when it all began, that when I give advice when asked for it, or my opinion, or my love or my consideration, that I'd know more beyond what lies before my eyes. Yes, I can see what's happening now, but I see the rest of it as well, and I'm sorry she can't, that right now she wont. I'm sorry I can't save her and I'm sorry we all have to sit idly by and watch what is happening to her because she wont accept help from a higher source... I'm sorry she has pushed away our Savior and forgotten the divine power of grace. I tried to tell her, to show her from my past experiences, but she's still so blinded. I still pray for her, I carry a prayer in my heart that encompasses most of it. I cry for her everyday... I will never abandon her, but I cannot save her, I've tried........ She has to save herself.

Updates, Updates, Updates....

So.... It's been almost a year since my last post and I do apologize to those who might actually read... I seem to lack the motivation, but now that life finds itself in full swing, I'm hoping blog posts will be away to slow things down a bit.

Since I last posted, (back in 2009) a lot has happened...


Back toward the end of February, Chase and I decided it was time to make an addition to our family. I wasn't sure if I was completely ready, but figured it'd probably take a month or two for anything to come about. I had let some family and friends know we were trying, one of those being sweet Katey who I worked with at Holy Smoke BBQ... I was at work one day, minding my own business, and in walks Katey. She stopped and just started staring at me and when I asked her what her problem was, she smiled at me and the first words out of her mouth were "You are so knocked up!" No, "Hello, how are you" or any kind of a welcome greeting. Now, for those of you who don't know, Katey has a history of making assumptions that, later down the road, come true, so when she told me I was "knocked up" I was a little shocked and became a wee bit anxious. All she could say all night were comments such as "you're eggo is prego," and "you totally have a bun in the oven," and so on. By the end of the night, my nerves were getting to me and I called a friend who picked up a pee stick for me and I ran to the bathroom to check it out. The result... was... negative. As I rubbed it in Katey's face that this time she was wrong, I went home a little disappointed after being on a high about possibly being pregnant. Two days passed and still no gifts from mother nature arrived so Chase went out and bought another pee stick and the next morning I took another test and lo and behold, my eggo was prego! Katey was right again! It came sooner than expected, but we were beyond excited!

It was a fairly easy pregnancy... the only time I would get sick was if I took a prenatal pill in the morning, had any kind of dairy, or Chinese food. After figuring all this out I just stayed away from it all and enjoyed whatever I could. We found out it was boy and right away started telling Jackson he was going to have a little brother. I worked up until I was about 8 months and ate enough BBQ to last me a lifetime. My good friend at Holy Smoke threw me a small baby shower and stocked me up on diapers and baby products. By the end of November, being much bigger than I was with Jack, I was miserable and just wanted to be done with the pregnancy and prayed on a daily basis to be able to give birth as early as was possible, but continued to waddle along even though three weeks before my due date I was already dilating.

We celebrated Jackson's 2nd birthday with our families at Hungry Bear Pizza, then with my grandparents, aunts and uncles with cake and ice cream. Jackson was sure spoiled and loved opening his gifts. Shortly after his birthday, I decided I was fed up with spending $150-$200 in gas every month and we decided it was best to put our durango up for sale and get something more fuel efficient. A few weeks later we sold our durango and another week later we found a 2003 Acura TL that I am in love with and so very blessed and happy to have. I was my birthday present and Christmas present and anniversary present and I only spend $60 a month! Yeah! Christmas was fun this year... Jackson understood a little more what was going on... He called Santa HO HO HO and was anxious to rip open presents that sat under every tree. Christmas morning he was spoiled by mom and dad and had a blast opening his gifts and about halfway through he got tired and gave up. Then we headed to my parents to exchange gifts and have some breakfast where Jackson was spoiled again. Then grandma Eileen came over and we exchanged gifts with her then it was off to my grandparents house to have some lunch, gifts and games. It was a long day but we had fun! And even though by this time I was dilated to a 4 and 85% effaced, still no baby, and not matter what I did to induce labor, nothing worked and so I continued waddling on.

A few days later I was scheduled to be induced and on the 28th. We dropped Jackson off to his Aunt Crystal to play with his cousins for a few days and Chase and I headed to the hospital where, when I arrived, was full swing in labor. The put me on the pit to speed things up and it was fully my intention to do this without an epidural (only because our insurance stinks and doesn't pay for a thing!) But after being fully effaced and dilated to almost a 7, I couldn't seem to handle the pain anymore. I was trying hard to hold back the tears and was irritable and truly was not enjoying the birthing experience. So I gave in and had an epidural. 20 mins later I was relaxed and starting to enjoy myself again, and a few hours later baby dos decided he wanted out. The resident doctor came in to check me and they quickly got ready and 6 pushes later at 2:53, out came Clayton Norman Sawyer, weighing 7 lbs 12 oz and 20 inches long. I was in labor a total of 7 hours, whereas with Jackson I was in labor about 16 hours and pushed for almost 2 hours.
Just this last Sunday we blessed Clayton. He has been such a wonderful addition to our family and we love him so very much and cannot get enough of him. Jackson is so sweet with him and loves his brother very much. He is always so concerned when Clay starts crying and is so good to get him is binki, help with feeding him is bottle and loves to hold him. Jackson has yet to ask me to take Clay back to the hospital, so I'm taking that as a good sign.
2 weeks after giving birth we closed on a home in Layton and moved in right away. It's a small and cozy 2 bedroom 2 bath home. We are really enjoying being homeowners, even after this weekend when our water heater broke or the weekend before that when we replaced our backdoor and found out that all the wood around the door was rotted and moldy. Our additions to the house have been the back door, new rain gutters, new closet organizers, new water heater and we pulled up the old pergo flooring and replaced it all with beautiful tile. We are loving our home and Jackson is loving the room he has to run around and having his own front and backyard that he doesn't have to share or worry about getting hit by a speeding car. Then a week ago we added another to our family... she's an adorable Mini Aussie/Border Collie named Mack, short for Mackenzie. She has been a lot of fun and it's a blast to watch her play with Jackson. ( I will post photos of the house and puppy soon... puppy chewed up my camera cable and a new on is on it's way in the mail... new cable that is, not puppy)

I have truly felt very blessed with all that has happened, although very overwhelming at times, I am very grateful for all that I have, all that I learn, the great family that is always there for us, all the experiences I've been through and will go through from here on out. I am truly enjoying life and thank my Father in Heaven for all he has given us.

It's about time... It's about space... It's about time to...

Post an update! Yeah! Yippe!

My sincerest apologies for the lapse in three months without a post. We've had a lot happen within that time. We went from living with chase's mom (and a huge thanks to her for letting us do so) to a small place of our own (thanks to a great friend with awesome hook ups) and so we are back in Layton! We really enjoy our new place and love the fact that Jackson has his own bedroom and lots of room to wander and explore. Jackson enjoyed his first halloween as motocrosshero(!) and a frog... We went trick-or-treating with uncle Payden and also visited Grampa at his work and did a bit of trick-or-treating there.

Jackson also had his first birthday back in November and was a little cowboy (a very handsome cowboy I might add).

He had a lot of fun and a big thank you to all who contributed! We had a lot of fun and we are so grateful for good family and friends and good BBQ! We also had Christmas pass in the time I last posted. This was Jackson's second Christmas and had a blast ripping open presents. It was fun to watch and realize my boy is growing so fast. Chase and I had also celebrated our 3 year anniversary and what a wonderful 3 years it has been. We have made so many memories and continue looking forward to the ones we will make in the future.

Chase is enjoying work and learning more about the restoration company. He has taken on a lot at work and had learned a lot and has become a great asset to his company. I am still with the Holy Smoke BBQ and am still enjoying (with the exception of a few days and a few customers) helping run the joint. I have made some great friends working there as well!

This weekend I will be traveling down to Vegas for Tiffanie's birthday with our friends Jerr and Trish and am looking forward to the much needed time off. However, this will be the first time in my marriage that I have gone somewhere without Chase and it will be the first time being without Jackson for more than a few hours. I'll be sad not to have my boys around, but my girls will be sure to cheer me up. This will be the first time in years that I have been out with friends and I am very excited!

Other than work, playing momma and dadda, we're just trudging along making the most out of what we have been blessed with!

Time...

It's been a while since my last blog... okay a long while. I've had so much on my mind lately and have had a rush of emotions the past few months. So in my ramblings of feelings, stories I will do my best to update all ya all on the Sawyer life.

Chase terminated, by his own choice, ( and my stubborn opionion) his employment with The Brokerage. All in all they did not treat him very well and I felt they were becoming quite dishonest in their dealings. Chase is now working with a resortation company that cleans and finished houses that have been damaged by water, fire etc etc etc. So far he is enjoying it and learning a lot and is happy not to have the stress of the Brokerage hanging over his head anymore. I am currently working for a small, privately owned BBQ joint in Layton and have been enjoying it as well... It's a lot of work, but I seem to enjoy it okay.

Jackson is almost a year old! I cannot believe it! He has the cutest and funnest personality. He's walking all over the place, eating 'big boy food' and feeding himself, talking and learning all sorts of new words, loves to bark and meow. He's become a great napper the past few weeks (which has allowed me to sit down and post this) and is an incredibly happy boy. I feel so incredibly blessed to have him in our lives, words truly cannot describe the amazing emotions I feel knowing Chase and I have the oppritunity to rasie a child of God.

So this last week we headed down to the dunes with my family and some friends of my dads... It was a blast to get away from life and the stress of life and just be able to relax for a bit. I did realize something this weekend that I'm sure I will experince more than just this one time. It was UEA weekend for a lot of people and so all the campgrounds were packed. We had something less than the privalge of camping next to a wild and crazy group of obnioxious people. The first night we were there, they had a dog that barked all night long... the second night they cranked up the music all night long... Which wasn't much of a problem until their sreaming music started waking up Jackson and then started becoming rather suggestive with the lyrics. I was upset the first time it woke up Jackson, but continued to do my best to relax and let them do their thing until the lyrics took a turn for the worst and I was furious... Without even stopping to think about what I was doing (walking into a group of about 20 drunk people) I calmly walked around a tree to their camp and polielty asked them to turn it down a bit. I didn't ask them to turn it off, just to turn it down. The guy to my right looked glazed over as if he didn't understand a word I was speaking while the guy in front of me proceeded to say he'd turn it down at 10:00 when quite time was enforced. I looked at him, rather upset and loudly explained they were keeping up children we'd been trying to keep alseep for the past 2 hours and if the music wasn't turned down in 15 minutes (it was 9:45 at the time of my verbal adventure), I'd go complain (to who I didn't know) and that I'd appreciate it if they'd follow through. I didn't really give him anytime to make a come back and I walked away. I guess Chase had followed me and hid in the darkness as my back up incase anyone came after me. I just don't understand how inconsiderate people can be. I didn't ask them to turn it off, just to turn it down to the point where our children could sleep in peace without having to fall asleep to sexual exploiations of some sad pathetic lyricist that can't find anything better to sing about. They did turn it down at 10:00... I hope it was becasue they were afraid of what I could do to them in my sober stance. There are just some things I will never understand. Other than that, we had so much fun and did Jackson... The loved playing in the sad and getting dirty.

Some other news... Chase got his Elk this year!!! And it's some dang good meat too. Other than that life has just been life I guess... We're just trudging along like most families doing our best to make it by. We're looking forward to Halloween with Jackson this year and his birthday!

I have a few pics to post, but I need to download them to the computer, so there is more to follow, and hopefully soon!

Up hill we go...

I just got home from a bike ride with Jackson this morning... It's my attempt to lose some weight and for today and attempt to help Jack feel better. He hasn't been feeling very well and has been couped up in the house for a few days, so I figured I'd take him out to get some fresh air and burn some calories while I'm at it. The awful thing about riding my bike is that I live on a hill side and most routes I can take are uphill. Granted, once you go up, you have to come down but it takes 15 mins to go up and 2 mins to come down- and for a squatty mommy who hasn't really worked out (other than a few tae-bo workouts about 7 months ago) it's a bit difficult, especially seeing as how it's not only the weight of myself and the bike I'm dragging uphill, but also my 20 lb son and the bike trailer. So needless to say it's a little rough, but I'm am making the attempt, and when I get back into shape, I'm sure I will start to enjoy it a bit more. Jack seems to like the time outside tho, and claps durning the ride, especially when we are getting some speed coming down the hills.

Well, Jack is 8 months old now, and I truly cannot believe it... It's been going by so fast and I wish I could somehow grab time by the ankle and slow it down- My baby boy is going to be all grown up before I know it. He has been crawling and getting into everything and he's starting to not only pull himself up to tables and chairs, but he's beginning to walk around them as well. I just hope he's not walking till after our family trip up to Lyman, just for my sake.

For the fourth of July we went to Lagoon with my some of my family and spent the day there. We had a great time and Lagoon was surprisingly not busy at all which made it even better. We didn't watch fireworks because the day after we woke up early and headed to Heber to go wheeling with some friends. That was also a lot of fun although I could have done with out the nasty dust roads... I literally went from a redhead to completely black hair. It was everywhere- in the nose, the ears, the shirt... everywhere, but it was worth fun we had.

Continued...

And now I will continue with where I left off before the haircut fiasco. So far this year we have gone to the sand dunes (April) Paiute Trial (May) and we just got back from a short trip from Idaho. The sand dunes where Jackson's first camping trip... well his first long trip anywhere. He did great, loved it and loved being on the rhino for our short family trip. Joe, Avery and Brea were also there along with my family and Mike, Crystal and the boys. It was a blast, especially when Ave and I got lost on the rhino trying to find the bathroom in the dark. Paiute was muddy and a bit rainy, but at least it wasn't dusty like last year. We had a 9 families there and rode our hearts out every day. Jackson had a blast too and again loved riding in the rhino. When he heard it start up he'd kick his legs and get a huge smile on his face. We took the jump up for him as well and hooked it on a "zip line" Chase had tied to two trees. Jack though it was great! Needless to say it was another great get-away (especially since I'd started working)

We just got back from our last trip a few days ago with some friends from Idaho. We just headed up the canyon a ways from where they live and camped out for a few days. It was hot, but the place was beautiful! We camped next to a small creek and even though the forest ranger stop us to tell us our UTV was illegal on trails for 4 wheelers, we still managed to find "truck trails" to have some fun on. Our next trip we are looking forward to is Flaming Gorge with Chase's Dad and family.